Success-Failure-Thinking … Go Beyond it!

Success-Failure-Thinking … Go Beyond it!

Grow your Self beyond the concepts of typical success-failure-thinking. We are a few weeks into the new year now and for many  scrutinizing their “new failures” in regards to their new goals have already begun. In thinking about your New Year’s Resolution, I invite You to step out of the familiar goal setting and give something entirely different to your Self. Rather than going after something outside of now and You, strengthen what is …

Choose, as often as You can remember, to give your Self some appreciation. Appreciate anything which is true about You. The truth always strengthens us, even if it is a truth that You might not like. When You acknowledge it, You actually place it within the realm of your personal power – and how that is important is that now You can actually do something about it! So what, if as a new approach, just for a month, You would make an effort to appreciate your Self daily?! Yes, even on “bad” days. And then let your Self experience how your life might have lightened… If You truly would not feel differently after a few weeks, feel free to go back to old ways of judging, doubting and dismissing your Self. Success-failure-thinking is familiar…we all learned it early on during our socialization – and – does it TRULY strengthen us?

How do I appreciate my Self? With simple thoughts like…

  • Your honesty about feeling vulnerable;
  • The good friend/spouse/parent/child/professional You are;
  • Your efforts to do something for You or others;
  • Your struggle when You haven’t been perfect;

Appreciate your Self for remembering — when you forgot to acknowledge your (lovable) humanness.

Risk loving your Self more … just as You can. Appreciate your slightest effort to contradict those sabotaging inner voices. There is no one better suited to support You in achieving your goals than You are!

Feel the gentle yet powerful effects of your own appreciation. Go beyond the imprisoning of success-failure-thinking in your life and start strengthening your Self by loving You, just as You are …

With love ~ Siljoy

New Year Resolutions

New Year Resolutions and “Up until now …”

So many of us begin a year with a list of New Year resolutions. Here is a holistic approach I recommend to start manifesting any change.

Think about ant habit that You want to change. How have You thought of your Self in regards to this habit? Then add these three little words: “Up until now…”© and repeat it to your Self. For example, instead of thinking “I always procrastinate”, rephrase it as “Up until now, I have been procrastinating and — I am changing it now.”

By adding these three little words You create a new situation for your Self, consciously and sub-consciously! Up until now…You need to put your undesired behavior into past tense in order to use correct grammar. This reinforces the idea that You are done with this pattern.
By acknowledging your reality, You are strengthening your Self. Even if it is a painful truth, honoring one’s truth is always strengthening!
With “up until now” You open a window of possibility and take a good first step into manifesting your new reality. The beauty is that in all my years of teaching to use these three little words, I and my clients have observed, how suddenly they started taking new steps…out of old habits and into new desired habits.

Respect the Power of Words! Up until now…

Once You decide to learn something new or to create a change, such as reducing your weight, pay attention to the words and statements You use. If we fill our thoughts with self-sabotaging words, we face difficulties in achieving our goal. Let me share an example here to make it even clearer…

For example, think of the statement “I am trying to lose weight.” It is a doubly self-sabotaging sentence. Our subconscious is trained to believe that “losing” is not good for us, such as losing keys or a wallet. We all learned that “losing something” means we need to find it again — welcome to the famous “yo-yo effect” in dieting by having to find the “lost weight” again!

Secondly, the word “trying” implies failure. By saying that You are trying, You are telling your Self that You will or can not do it. The word “trying” is applied appropriately only to true past failure “I tried and I failed” and to trying on clothes in a store. I’d like to suggest a different statement: “I am on the path of dropping or reducing weight.” Or even better, healthier: “I am gaining muscle weight and shedding excess body fat.”

Read more on weight issues and take a look at my Perspectives on Holistic Weight “Loss” web page.

With love ~ Siljoy